a self-care guide: the mind

 Hello there and welcome back to my blog!

 I want to address a word that’s been buzzing for quite some time: self-care. On Google, it’s defined as “the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress” (Such a mental health-aware definition from Google, we love to see it!) Although we all have our own favorite methods of self-care, I wanted to share a few of the ones that I’ve been using recently. When I was listing them out, I realized that there are two different kinds of self-care that I’ve been practicing: one of the mind and one of the body. So with that, let’s get right into some self-care for the mind!

Choose Your Apps Wisely

 Will I ever get through one blog post without mentioning Tiktok or Instagram? We may never know. But there is such a strong reason behind why I bring it up consistently, and that is because they are gross and something about them and the way we interact with them needs to change IMO. I never really feel better about anything when I close out of either of them. I follow and interact with my friends and family, in addition to other informative and inspiring accounts on these apps. And still. Ads sneak their way in. Videos that condone toxic behavior somehow continue to boil up to the top of my FYP. I am exposed to unrealistic beauty standards on the daily. So. To help with avoiding these two apps, I have downloaded these other two apps: Duolingo and Headspace.

 Ok, but honestly. If you have Duolingo, add me right now because it is starting to become my favorite app. If you don't know, it's an app that provides courses for learning languages. I am learning French and not to flex or whatever, but I am currently sitting in the diamond league, which if you know about Duolingo… it's the highest tier that you can be in omg. Duolingo provides so many incentives for participating, learning, and bettering myself so it also kind of caters to the praise craving that social media apps have instilled within me. It is seriously not to be slept on.

 Headspace is another app that rewards users for streaks and acknowledges their growth. It is focused on meditation and mindfulness. I used to despise meditation. I could not understand its benefits because even though I would be tuned in for a session, I would still walk away with a lot of stress afterwards. However, after watching Mission: Joy - Finding Happiness in Troubled Times (which I highly recommend) featuring the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, I realized that meditation is not about having immediate effects on our mental state, but rather it serves as a state of mind that we can call on when things are overwhelming.

 For instance, every morning I wake up and listen to a guided meditation. During it, I am told to close my eyes and bring attention to my breath and the weight of my body on a surface. Even though I am usually stressed right after I open my eyes again, as I move throughout my day, I can remember what it felt like to be utterly focused on my presence, and how in those moments, that itself felt like enough. It’s a total game changer in shifting perspective.

 I also really like Headspace because they create a curated meditation course to follow through the day. I never have to go through and find my own meditation lessons or exercises on the app if I don’t want to. It’s like having a FYP of meditation. I get excited to see what they have planned for me at the start of every day.

Time Management

 Next up, we have time management. I know that some people have to work in a tidy environment in order to be productive or think straight. I don't operate that way, but I do relate because I think better and more clearly when I manage my time well, which is like a tidying of the mind. Without writing things down, assignments and commitments will float around in my head, sometimes popping up at the forefront like a spike of adrenaline, “Wait, how many more days until I need to have this done?” Two main things that I use to keep up to date on all of the moving parts of my life are Google Calendar and a weekly planner on my fridge.

 I use my Google Calendar for any event that’s scheduled, whether that be my work shifts, social outings, or doctor’s appointments. Everything is color-coded. I also have reminders for each of these. Usually I will have a reminder set for a day before and then another for an hour before, just in case! These reminders show up on my watch and phone so I can always see them.

 Although the calendar is very helpful in getting me to where I need to be, I noticed that it still wasn’t enough. I was forgetting things that I had to do in order to prepare for these events along with other things that I needed to do in general. Cue the dry-erase weekly planner on my fridge. I use her as a to-do list. At the start of each week, I look at my Google Calendar and think about what I need to do for those events along with what errands I need to run. I will write them in and cross them out as I go through the week–so satisfying. I also make sure to include the exciting stuff with the not-so exciting stuff. For instance, every week I make sure to include Bachelor Mondays because I look forward to it. This balance helps me stay motivated and keeps me from feeling overwhelmed.

Reading and Writing

 Reading is perfect for extending attention span. Tiktok has brought me to a point of zero attention span. It’s a joke among Gen Z Tiktokers that we, as a generation, can no longer pay attention to anything for a substantial period of time because we have gotten so used to receiving fast-paced, bite-sized content.

 I just saw this Tiktok with nearly 15M views. It's a skit of this guy who is professing his feelings on a date, but because the other person doesn’t have a long enough attention span to focus on what is being said, he has to pull out a video of a Subway Surfers gameplay as he continues to profess his feelings. It’s a play on how nowadays, since most of us don’t really have the attention span to listen or view a video of someone simply speaking for even more than a minute, some Tiktoks will include a gameplay video in addition to other content to help us maintain our focus. It can be really painful to go from this kind of high-stimulation environment to something as mentally demanding as a 2-hour college lecture.

 When I notice that my attention span is suffering, I turn to reading. It is low stakes–unlike paying attention in a work meeting or to a date who is confessing their feelings–so it’s a good place to start. Plus, it can still be very entertaining and rewarding. It’s definitely intimidating at first because it takes so much concentration, but just like with anything, if you persist, growth is guaranteed to appear.

 Extending our attention spans can help slow down the rate at which thoughts travel in our minds–a great assistant to the management of stress and anxiety. Another thing is, when reading fiction, we are forced to think from a different perspective than our own. I came across this study that proves this point. It concludes that reading fiction specifically is good for our brains, not just through nurturing our attention spans, but also through building our problem-solving and people skills. Gaining these skills ultimately deepens our sense of empathy and understanding for those around us, which lessens the effects of anxiety and depression.

 As for writing, my blog is great because it encourages me to self-reflect and also provides a platform of communication with my online community. Journaling is also fun, and more personal. I recently invested in a gratitude journal from Target that prompts me daily with gratitude-oriented questions. It effectively reverses some of my pessimistic thought patterns. Sometimes I will also write a free-style journal entry in a notebook when I'm not feeling up to sharing my thoughts with someone else. The entries are pretty small and only take about 5 minutes to write so they never come up as a time concern.

 So there you have it. A few of the things that I keep in my back pocket to protect my brain in times of stress! If you have any self-care practices for the mind, please share them with me because I am always open and would love to hear about your self-care journeys. But that's all for now so thank you so much for tuning in, take (self-) care and I will catch you all next time!